Happy Birthday, Harry
by Laura Chant
Summary: DH Spoliers It is his birthday today. He is 27 years old. I’m stressing the word old. I have just turned six so I am excited to see if daddy has a Power Rangers cake like I had. He doesn’t. He is a big disappointment.


**Spoilers for Deathly Hallows.**  
Happy Birthday, Harry.  
(1748)

I used to dream at night that bad men were climbing in the window to take me away. I'd wake up crying (just a bit!) and Mummy would rush in and give me a cuddle.

'As if bad men would ever come to our house,' Mummy would smile, as she pushed my hair off my forehead, 'they wouldn't want to run into the great Harry Potter, would they? He's a hero your dad. He'd never let anything happen to any of us.'

I never understood this. Because -well- my daddy is an idiot. Like, a proper idiot. Once when I was four I fell off my toy broom in the living room and smashed into the coffee table. I cut my arm and ran immediately to my daddy. I am not ashamed to admit this but it was rather sore. I didn't cry or anything but I needed something to stop the pain. Like daddy says at breakfast time after he goes out with my uncles.

'Oh Ginny-' dad had said, 'get my wand would you? This is going to need to be cut off.'

I, naturally, completely spazz out because like hell (Uncle Ron says that a lot) am I having anything detached from my body but Daddy just laughed and then said, 'Oh, well, if you don't want that I suppose I could cure you with the TICKLES!'

Dad loves the tickles. It's embarrassing. He does it _so_ much AND when I least suspect it ... he seems to love it even more if it's in public and I'm pleading loudly for him to stop in between gasps of air. I had to kick him in the Tommy Tweeter once just to get him to stop. He didn't attack me for like a month after that. Mum said that was very bad of me but she was laughing so hard she cracked her head on the doorframe.

Mum says dad is a hero a lot. I do not see this. At breakfast time when he's standing in his boxers scratching his bum holey I don't understand how he could ever beat anything up. He's skinny and has spectacles and weird body fluff and really messy hair. Okay, I have messy hair too but that's daddy's fault as well and I could so win a fight over my dad. I know kung-foo. Though if he used his tickles I'd be in a tight spot.

It is his birthday today. He is 27 years old. I'm stressing the word _old_. I have just turned six so I am excited to see if daddy has a Power Rangers cake like I had. He doesn't. He is a big disappointment.

Thousands of billions of millions of squillions of owls come for Daddy. He says he don't know half the people who send them- and vaguely knows the rest. Everyone in the phonebook turns up at the house and hugs daddy and gives mummy big sloppy kisses on the cheek. She doesn't even wipe it off! She giggles! Dad is laughing lots too. I don't understand why he is so popular. If they all saw him with his shirt off they'd all leave straight away.

'Uck look at them.' Lavender Brown says, her and Parvati Patil staring goo-goo eyed at Dad who had pulled Mum onto his lap and was kissing her neck. She was laughing loudly and trying to squirm out of his grip. 'Didn't think he'd ever find anyone ... childhood like that- I mean you hear rumours about what he went through but it's probably nothing close to the truth.'  
Parvati nodded. 'Locked under the stairs for most of his life Rita Skeeter said- no food- no toys … no love.' Parvati sighed longingly. 'He must treat his kids like bloody angels.'  
'Where's the new one anyway?'  
'Dunno think Ron's mum has him- did you hear what they called it?'  
'I know. I know. I had to stand in front of the mirror before I came and say it about fifty times until I stopped bursting into hysterics. I still can't talk to Ginny with a straight face.'

'Never thought he'd make it to twenty seven,' another person says, James listens intently, going unnoticed by those around him, 'bloody legend that bloke.'  
'He's so dashing- don't look at me like that- it's not like I'd make a move or anything.' One woman grumbles as the man standing next to her gives her a look. 'Just look how happy he is with Ginny! With his family- never had a family poor guy- now he seems to have more than he knows what to do with.'

'Oh you look so like him,' Grandma Weasley coos at me and pinches my cheek.  
'Gerroff please,' I say, remembering my manners.  
'Oh you're so handsome ... such a big boy,' Grandma says ignoring me. 'You look more like Harry's father I suppose God rest his soul- but sometimes you just look like that little boy I first met at King's Cross.'  
James has had this problem of looking like his father for all of his life. Well mostly- Albus looks more like him now even though he's only a few months old. But James spent most of his childhood licking Teddy Lupin in an attempt to catch whatever the hell he had so he could have blue hair too.

'I still say he's mentally unbalanced.' James hears, turning around.  
'Seamus!'  
'What? Were you out with him last weekend? I counted. Ten girls came up to him. He didn't even entertain any of them. They were all fit as well!'  
'He's married.'  
'He's the saviour of the world ... he's like- like-'  
'A Power Ranger?'  
James's eyes widen.  
'Aye,' Seamus says, 'the gay one.'

And as James wanders around the party he hears more and more stories of his Daddy. He hears people's stories of the War, of how my daddy died and came back to life to save everyone. How he broke into Gringotts and rode on a dragon and all these other storybook type tales. He listens as Uncle Ron relates the story of how they all became friends.

'Bloody big Troll, your mum is of course screaming-'  
'Mum screams a lot,' Rose tells me matter-of-factly as I approach, 'mostly because Daddy and Uncle George are being _silly_ and putting our lives in danger.'  
Rose likes to be dramatic sometimes.  
'I swear!' she continues. 'They fed Hugo U-No-Poo once and I didn't see him for a week!'  
'-So Uncle Harry and I run in and James, your dad leaps on top of this thing without a second thought and sticks his wand up its nose!'  
Rose screams with laughter. Hugo sticks a chocolate finger up his own nose.  
'How did that make you friends?' James asks, not really seeing how nearly getting yourself killed was a great way to meet people.  
Uncle Ron grinned. 'Your Aunt Hermione lied to the teacher to get me and Harry out of trouble- she saved our necks ... plus, we figured if we could tackle a mountain troll together we could be a pretty unstoppable trio.'  
'And your dad realised he had the hots for your mum,' Uncle George piped up. The Chocolate finger that had been up Hugo's nose just missed him.

---

I've been crying in the cupboard under the stairs for the past five years (minutes). It's dark and there's spiders in my hair and I keep knocking against the hoover and sneezing because of the dust but I don't care because I'm so sad.

Finally the cupboard door opens and my daddy is there with a look of utter shock on his face. I knew he'd find me. He always does. And I know in my heart that if he couldn't find me he wouldn't rest until he did.

'James?' he asks timidly, crouching down to my level.  
'You had no daddy!' I cry, as a broom falls on my head and I cry harder.  
'Oh baby,' Harry says, climbing into the cupboard beside me, the door falling shut behind him. It's dark with only a crack of light falling in from under the door but I feel my dad's big arms wrapping around me and he kisses the top of my head. 'It's okay, it's okay.'  
'It's not okay!' I sob. 'You had no mummy or daddy to make jokes or take you to Quidditch matches or read you stories at n-night time. N-no daddy to ... to check- check under the bed f-for Voldemort and and you were all alone!'

I'm wailing loudly now. Clutching onto my daddy's shirt and getting it all snotty.  
'Shhh, James, James,' he's laughing but I don't find it funny at all, he disentangles himself from my kung-foo grip, 'what's brought this all on now? Surely you've heard it all before?'

'All those people, they- they were talking about me and you and I'm- I'm like you so much and they said- they said that I'm so lucky to have a daddy like you and I really am even though you don't wear trousers to breakfast and don't like the P-Po… Power Rangers!'

Daddy is laughing really loudly now. It kind of shocks the tears out of me.

'Why- why are you laughing?'  
'Nothing- nothing,' I can see him smiling even though it's really dark, 'I love you, you know that right?'  
I nod.  
'I really do, you know, since I first laid eyes on you I adored you ... and I would do everything in my power to make sure you had the best childhood, with the best bedroom and the best parents in the world.'  
I sniffed. Dad offered me his sleeve to wipe my nose.  
'Mummy says you're a hero.'  
'I'm not- mummy just likes to inflate my ego sometimes.'  
'You're my hero,' I say abruptly. And it's true. Even though he's twenty-seven years old and stupid I love him because he's my daddy. And he's here with me. In a cupboard under the stairs.

My dad pauses, his brow crinkles just a bit as he stares at me. I sniff again and he brushes a tear off my cheek with his thumb. He reaches forward and pulls me close, kissing my forehead. He doesn't say anything but he doesn't need to. We stay in the cupboard for fifteen more minutes just hugging before he takes me out and we play Power Rangers in the back garden until bedtime.


End file.
